Cowards Everywhere I Turn

The double-edged blade splitting me in two,
Spreading the dull and sharp pains through my mind and soul,
Leave me alone all of you cutting my heart to slivers,
Playing with my heart making me your fool,
You’ve all got some nerve taking advantage of someone kind-hearted and sweet,
You all can kiss my ass I’m walking,
Take your cowardly ways and breathe it in,
One day someone will do the stomping and you’ll feel the demise you left living in me.

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Back to The Sun

The spinning parallels of my mind numbing the misery I am torn,
Flying back and forth between the happiness and turmoil I can’t seem to find the ground,
I briefly touch the heated soil from the sun’s rays with my toes,
The dirt warms my heart for a second and I am home,
The momentary change comforts the sadness and the anger filtering within,
Suddenly I spiral into the ground leaving behind my screaming soul,
Death and ice filters through my veins and I can’t see nothing but a colorless sky,
Please I beg,
Release me back to the sun,
The fury of the winter blues came way too soon,
Laughter echos in the chaos of my shattered world,
The madness making me weak,
My mind bleak,
Stuck like a rubber band between the two poles of summertime and the winter-land,
I bounce high and I bounce low,
Stopping no where in-between to find a place to call my happy abode.

Mind-Less Chatter Within

There’s hidden damage to my self-esteem I long to shed,
Most the time you’ll never know the pain that dwells inside my head,
The tears build inside,
Though the well is dry,
The pain digs so deep only my heart cries,
I crumble a little more,
Incapable of love,
I continue to try and try it’s a relentless affliction,
Perhaps I really don’t love myself,
Maybe I’m trying to kill all the love I find,
Thinking its not working,
I keep setting the traps,
Pouring the poison,
Drinking the damage in my rusted chains,
Bleeding and crying but it’s all the same,
It’s all of my doing,
I’m killing myself slowly,
I picked out my coffin today,
A card board box,
Placed the book of matches by the table,
Please set me aflame,
Turn me to ash,
Keep me contained,
Don’t release me in the wind,
I can’t be set me free,
Bury me deep so I can’t spread the emptiness consuming me,
I’m afraid I’ll infect another,
It’s a disease of the mind,
There’s no cure,
Lets end this tonight,
But shhh says my subconscious,
Tomorrow is upon us and the thoughts shall pass,
Put away the demons and rest your weary heart and mind my friend.

Blue Moon

My mind closes and I’m left inside the black mist,
The blue moon shines and I’m in a dark abyss,
There’s no voices to direct the torturous thoughts weighing in on my heart,
The numbness is making me a worthless piece of art,
Don’t waste your time,
I’m not allowing in any love from the outside,
Can’t make the pain subside,
Don’t walk away,
Run,
Before it pains you to see me this way.

The Seed of Doubt

Time spent with you was easier than learning to ride a bike,
Crooked smiles and soulful sights,
A passionate playground for two lovers lost,
Getting caught up time and time again in our selfishness,
I fell in love despite the fight,
Lost myself to this one-sided love affair,
Been trying to mend the pieces of my stitched and stapled heart,
Returned to the outside world to give it a whirl,
After sending so many suitors out to sea,
I finally found a love I could see,
Thinking we were finally through,
You’ve come confessing you actually do love me too,
It wasn’t just me,
Now it’s too late,
I can’t wait,
Though you’ve planted the seed of doubt,
To destroy the new love I’ve found,
In my heart and in my mind,
You’ll always be the love I’ve never known through this life time.

Jubilee

Don’t you know what happens each time we speak,
I lose a part of my mind leaving me weak,
Uncontrollable urges pulling me in deep,
The pulsating, throbbing suddenly creeping in and making scream,
Oh baby it’s extreme,
Do you feel me sending the electrifying thought waves and fucking with your control,
Don’t you want to make me yours,
Order me on all fours,
I’ll clue you in behind the curtains,
Grab us some glasses and bring the bourbon,
Don’t be afraid of digging in a little deeper,
Open your dark side and see how its sweeter,
Mmmm, lets take a ride,
Get in and play on the far side,
Forget about your day with me,
Let me be your little jubilee.

To Fear Love

I push the broom in a mindless manner,
Everything scatters,
There’s no direction,
Where’s my affection,
Sweeping the particles tied to me, Pretending I can’t see,
Ignoring what I’m doing lying I’m free,
Nothing can be close,
Place the rose,
I’ve disappeared,
No longer alive,
Sickened I can’t survive,
Brush the street,
Sweep me in,
Scoop me up,
Place me in a silver cup,
Drink what’s left,
So I can still live , alive, of all bereft.