Where is my warrior, my lord, my god?

Desire and passion
Just the mere thought brings me to my knees
Arms held overhead
My body against the wall
The heat of his breath whispering against my neck
His right knee gently wedged between my thighs pressing firmly against me
The ecstasy being in that moment of energy
I sigh…
Those are the thoughts that haunt me
The way his scent intoxicated me
He was the lover before last
He was a universal love
Where we made love in the clouds underneath the stars
Yet the strength of his kiss missed the erotic touch I missed
If I could take his pleasure and mix it with another
One who kisses of fire and desire
I would have the perfect lover
The last lover tragically missed
The orgasms were there, but the kisses too wet to maintain a spark!
I Want
I Need
FIRE!!!
I want to feel my heart gasp
I want my stomach to fall
I need to be on the cusp of fainting and screaming for more
I crave a warrior
I want him to tear my goddess walls down
Chip away inch by inch with a fiery kiss
To turn my world upside down
To bring me to my knees
To weep of erotic joy
To take me back to the stars
With the moon as my guard
Where I belong
I need to feel loved and desired
So I ask…
Where is my warrior, my lord, my god?

The Stories He Hides

If I take a male lover 
And he pretends to be mine

I would hate to hear of his past lovers, the ones that bear the darkest of secrets 

Especially those during his drug addiction days

I don’t want to know of his lovers-and if there truly were male lovers 
Doubt will fill my head

and if it is true

I will wonder…

Did he love them just the same 

as he pretended to love me?

I feel betrayed
These are not secrets you keep from your intimate partner

He knew every light and dark part of me 

And I knew very little of him 

Shame on me

The woes of taking a male lover who took another male lover
Though he pretends to be one way

He can’t escape the lies- they’ve caught up to the stories he hides

A Memory Book of Love and Lust

I stand still
Water beats forcefully against my chest
Enclosed within narrow glass doors
Steam clouds my view
Alone with drops of poison
I recognize they’re my thoughts of you

They caress my brain
In a loving painful way
Like a slow torturous kiss
The way my tongue used to trace your lips
The way your body swayed with uncontrollable desire
As my mouth danced in between and around your thighs

I scream
I pray
I want the memories to fade
To drain off me like the water flowing from my skin
Into the pipes
To make their way into the ocean’s waves

I want to flow freely
Fly with my battered wings
I want to display my scars
War wounds of love
The beauty of survival
My heart beats wickedly
Ready for a new desire

I am trying to hold on to love’s memory
And I am trying to erase it at the same time
Torn between heaven and hell
A memory book of love and lust
I burn the pages and singe my soul at the same time

A Man Wants to Adore

You’ve got to grow,
Spread your heart and fly,
Stop hovering and holding on to air,
There’s nothing left from years ago,
Ridiculously and childishly,
You cling to,
What?
Should’ve,
Could’ve,
Treated your man right,
A gutter mouth is a bedroom delight,
Not a way to respect your man,
Not the way your words run amuck,
Stop running to seek and stalk,
Can’t compare hamburger to steak,
Aged rib eye is better than carving fat off grisly chuck,
Should’ve realized the gem you had,
Should’ve treated your loved ones good,
With ultimate respect,
Not only when you had to,
People change,
They evolve,
Get treated like they’re meant to,
Like they deserve,
Who wants vanilla when creme brûlée sits at your feet,
Who wants aggressiveness when submissiveness caresses,
And adheres to all commands,
A man’s treat,
Domineering behavior should come from the man,
Not some twisted behavior of some woman,
Know your place,
This ain’t apples and oranges,
You don’t compare to me,
I’m rare,
Exotic,
And I know my place,
Know how to treat a man of gold,
Like treasure,
Stand behind your king like a queen should,
Respect him,
His family,
Friends,
Feed him,
And become the submissive,
Ravishing whore,
A man,
Wants to adore.

With Red Eyes

Baby baby baby
You just don’t know what you do to me
There’s another person living inside of me

Better run over to our church
Grab a priest
Daemons have me thinking wild thoughts
He needs to bless me

There is this secret I can’t keep
There’s this hidden desire
Chasing me
It’s making me want to do
Bad things

Every time you’re pressing your fingers down
Digging into me
Convulsions take over my mind

I’m hypnotized
My pagan ways resurface
Returning me
The goddess of desire begins to baptize me
In a pool of wine

There is this secret I can’t keep
There’s this hidden desire
Chasing me
It’s making me want to do
Bad things

I want to punch you
Slap the erotic right out of you
Let me kiss you fiercely with red eyes

Baby baby baby
You just don’t understand
Maybe you do
Maybe you’re the god of sexual longing
Making me your fool

Let me scream out your name
Let me ride your dragon
Let me inhale your flames
Let me go out of my mind

I don’t want to keep this secret
I want to punch you
Slap the erotic right out of you
Let me kiss you fiercely with red eyes

(The photo is a negative taken by my friend Deisi of me the other night)

Your Gift, My Soul

Looking back
Through the window of rewind
Taking me back to the other night
I stare through the looking glass
I watch with wide eyes
My heart a wild mare
Desperate to record
The images
The sounds
The intensity increases
And our sweat glistens
Diamonds decorate our sheets with our jewels
You begin to whisper
The words
So many
Many
Many words
The things you say to me
While you are ravishing my maddening flesh
I cannot translate all of this
I must savor some
I will share this
When you ask me to pour my essence for you
Over your magical wand
Again
And again
And again
An abundance of your prized cocktail
Flows an endless river of love
You make my soul scream
You seduce my mind and body
Leaving my soul in your command
I can’t resist you
I have to have more
And more
And more
I have to lose complete control
I need to give you your gift
My soul